Shades of Grey
by digitalgrey
Summary: A young man's search for answers takes him to some unexpected places, Constantine's a dangerous guide but what the HELL. This is my first entry on fanfiction, kinda nervous. Please review please, I would really apperciate it.
1. MEA CULPA

He always wanted to know why. He needed to know why he had these thoughts, if there was a god why was he cursed with these temptations? 

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Gerald Kelly closed his latest acquisition; a book on crystalogy, it joined the growing collection under his bed. Books on spiritualism, astrology and numerology all hidden; all forbidden. At one point he had owned more tomes but he had threw them all away when his mother had found them. The only books he had managed to keep were the Mythology ones, the old bag had considered them "harmless"; if only she knew. Although the mythology had taught him a lot about symbols and god-forms, they didn't show him how to speak to the hidden forces. Which was why he had spent nearly all his student loan in the local occult shop named Aquarius. He sighed despondently, he would never find the answers. He laughed mirthlessly, he had just wasted 80 dollars he didn't have, on the book and the matching healing crystals.

He took a seat on the small bed and looked out the grimy window. The apartment was a small decaying box with numerous prints of arcane imagery decorating the peeling walls. Sunlight streamed in through the small window casting distorted shadows on the walls from the Buddha, dragon and Egyptian statues on the table in the centre of the room.

Why was he still doing this? Why? He reached for the packet of caffeine tablets and downed eight in one swallow. He ran a hand through his jet black hair and examined the dark circles under his hazel eyes. Gerald didn't want to sleep, too much research to do, to many secrets to look for and never enough time, he was always running out of time.

He checked his mobile; he was late for his art lecture. Gerald ran out the door and headed down the road at a brisk run. The large grey apartment block growing smaller behind him. As usual he wasn't paying much attention to where he was going and found himself stepping on something. He looked down and saw a dead whippet, it's jaw hanging open grotesquely. He jumped back in alarm and looking closer saw that the dog's teeth had been replaced by gold dentures, and that the death wound was in the shape of a Cancerian astrology symbol with a Sagittarian one just above it. His sun and ascendant signs.

"Oh shit", he breathed quietly and crossed himself. On the completion of the symbol, his hand and stomach started burning "Orator de Iaceo", he hissed in a voice that was not his own. Fuck he thought, what's happening to me? "No" he growled and the pain subsided enough for him to get his breath back, he was beginning to form an idea of what was happening and he was in serious trouble.

He ran as fast as he could, he knew where he wanted to go and he had to get there fast. He burst into Aquarius, the local occult shop where he bought books; breathing heavily. The place was stepped in the scent of incense with various pentagrams, strange statues, a crammed bookshelf against the wall and dreamcatchers stretching across the ceiling with a shelf nearby dedicated to crystals.

"Hello Gerald", David the shop owner greeted him cheerfully. He looked closer at the young man, then drew back with a look of horror on his face. "Help me", Gerald gasped. David looked at him again; Gerald's eyes were performing a extraordinary dance. The pupils were fading to a white iridescence, then deepening in tone to their original black. The tonal shift was accompanied by change in the young man's features from gormless idiocy to grim determination.

Gerald looked at the crystal shelf then staggered over and placed one of the clear quartz's on top of his head, knowing it's essence would help balance the seventh chakra. He hoped it would help establish his connection with the supreme light. He visualised a rose pyramid around his body with a white star feeding it at the top. It seemed to be working, he felt better and his breathing slowed. He launched into a explanation of what happened.

"Orator de Iaceo - teller of lies, you found yourself saying this when you blessed yourself?" Graeme gasped his reply in a hoarse whisper. "They've come for me David because I'm a sinner, because I 'm g-". "Shhhh Gerald, I have to phone someone. Please try to remain calm and don't let go of that crystal." "Hello Chas get John for me please, tell him it's urgent."


	2. CAVEAT EMPTOR

Thanks to Hated Crow and Val Mora I really appreciate the comments, and on we go 

As he sat there, he could hear the thing's thoughts, vile sordid images. Mind you Gerald gave as good as he got, filling his mind with the laughter of his friends and the voice of that nice lady he didn't know the name of; but who always asked him about his studies.

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Gerald's train of thought was broken by the sound of the disturbed wind-chimes at the shop's door. A tall thin man with a shock of unruly black hair that didn't quite fit with the sharp business suit he was wearing, had just entered the building. On closer inspection Gerald noticed the remains of a lit cigarette in his hand and his dark, shrewd eyes.

"John, I'm glad to see you." David grabbed the man by the hand and shook it enthusiastically. "Just like Ronald Mc Donald aren't I", John answered acidicly. He crossed the room to where Gerald was sitting and stared into his face intently.

"David, why are you wasting my fucking time? The things half out, it'll fade into the abyss in less then half an hour." "That's just it John, the kid managed to perform a self blessing, get in here and use a healing crystal all by himself. I think your also forgetting the fact that someone set a spirit trap with his markers on it, odd don't you think?"

John didn't answer, he just lifted a pentagram pendant from a nearby shelf, turned it upside down and held it against Gerald's head. "No NO", the young man screamed. "Get away from me, STOP IT." He was pummelling John with all his might, then slowly his efforts subsided. His face contorted into a sneer and his pupils faded to a milky iridescence. Growls issued from his mouth which slowly started giving way to guttural deformed speech:

"Constantine. The John Constantine, it's a honour although I think you've got this the wrong way round." Constantine smirked then replied, "Hey I'm curious, how does a big band Ardad demon like you get the living shit kicked out of him by a skinny uninitiated little kid, hell he doesn't even look that healthy." Gerald's mouth trailed a line of spittle and the demon said, "Why don't you mind your own business, see you later I'm out of here."

"Not so fast asshole, you wouldn't me dropping into Papa Midnight's and telling tales of the demon who did the half baked possession and got kicked out with no intervention would ya? Lou ain't big on failure from what I hear. I could tell a different tale though, ham it up a bit and spread stories of my gruelling battle with the terrible spirit who almost got the better of me, your choice."

A doubtful expression crossed Gerald's contorted features. "All I know is that, the kid was spotted traversing the usual spirit traffic, humans and their 'meditating'. You see them sticking their astral noses where their not wanted. Looks like someone took an interest because the management had a half breed rig up a vessel for me to wait in and here I am."

John smiled and simply said, "Cheers." He then moved to Gerald's ear and whispered, "Gerald Kelly, awake." In his own voice Gerald shouted, "In the name of the heavens above and the earth below, get thee gone."

Constantine watched the demon being ripped into hell, then laid a hand on Gerald's shoulder. "Not bad kid, my names John Constantine and I think we need to talk."

I promise the next chapter will be longer let me know what you think please!


	3. AMICUS

The freedom was like a rush of oxygen, enriching yet overwhelming. His thoughts were once again his own and now they were centered on this man, John Constantine.

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Gerald pushed John's hand from his shoulder. "You were feeding it. You were helping it take over my mind." John looked at Gerald with obvious scorn and said, "How stupid are you? I wanted answers even if you didn't." John pulled a cigarette from a packet and lit it before continuing, "You were gonna blast it away before we got anything from it." Gerald looked abashed, he raised his eyes and said, "You don't know what it's like, hearing its voice telling you you're sick and twisted. It was showing me things, things I want. I shouldn't want them but I do. Is that why the demon came, because I'm wrong as a person?

David stepped over to Gerald "What were you going to say, before I called Constantine? Maybe it's important, we need to know." Gerald looking frightened, stammered, "N-no not yet." David smiled at him and replied, "It's alright. I think you need some cheering up; it will restore your spirits. John, is Chas outside?" John was puffing on the cigarette, seemingly oblivious to both of them.

He answered David without looking at him, "In the cab."

David walked of the shop, leaving Gerald staring with mingled suspicion and curiosity at Constantine. "You'll catch flies kid, any good at deporting them?" asked Constantine. Gerald turned away with a look of disgust. John shrugged, flicking ash of the cigarette he was finishing.

Gerald groped in his pocket for the packet of caffeine pills. He felt completely drained and needed an energy boost, badly. Addiction was about the only thing he had in common with this, Constantine, John Constantine. A man who in his opinion was an arrogant psychopath, with all the charm of that demon he had been getting so cosy with. He broke the last five tablets out of their bubbles on the plastic sheet and swallowed them all.

David walked back in and gave Gerald a sympathetic smile. "Why don't you go and talk with Chas, he's outside in the taxi cab."

"Who's Chas", asked Gerald looking fatigued with the whole situation. He just wanted to go home and sleep, the caffeine pills seemed to be refusing to do their job.

"My assistant", said Constantine, removing another cigarette from the packet he was holding.

"I thought my life was hard. The poor sod must have built up seriously bad karma to be landed with that." Gerald then got up and walked out the door, glad to be escaping Constantine's smoke and surly manner.


	4. AMICUS part 2

Amicus was originally longer, but a problem with the site meant half of it got lost! Here's the rest. This story is taking a slash direction, it won't be graphic but it will be there.

"If you do get into heaven, you can be the patron saint of social graces", said David with a small laugh.

"I don't like my methods being questioned. Anyway, how's business? Anyone or anything interesting come in lately?"

David's thin face suddenly lost its amiable expression and became nervous. "Balthazar", he answered.

John turned sharply and said in a whisper, "What did he want?"

"Incense sticks, that's all. He must be decorating that plush office of his", answered David.

"I'm going after him; he's had his own way for far too long. I want to put a bullet in his forehead for what he did to Chas. If it wasn't for that piece of scum, the kid wouldn't be involved. He would be out getting drunk at the weekends and studying Psychology instead of Demonology."

"You know the rules, John. You can't upset the balance, none of us can." David's grey eyes, normally alert and cheerful looked resigned and bitter.

"Don't start that David, I get it from Gabriel, Midnite and now you. Is it balanced that Chas can't wear t-shirts because of the scars on his arms? Is it balanced that he spends half an hour checking the plugs at night because he's so afraid of fire? I was there, David, I saw what he did, he held him with red hot claws. He was going to…."

"Back then, all I could do was pull him off and prevent him getting near Chas again. Things have changed; I'll send that bastard screaming back to hell."

"The time will come Constantine. I never realised how much you cared about the kid."

"When I saw what Balthazar did to a fifteen year old boy. That was when I got serious, sure I wanted to get upstairs, still do. But more then that I want to make them pay", John answered.

David starred at John intently and said, "The balance, John there will be a time. If it hadn't happened, Chas would never have met you. At least acknowledge that. You're the closest thing he's ever had to a father in his whole life."

John's expression softened before he replied, "I watch him sleeping sometimes; I only took him in because he had nowhere else to go, I wanted rid of him. Now I can't let him out of my sight, it's too much responsibility, David. It shouldn't be like this, he doesn't deserve to be stuck in my life he deserves to be happy."

David reached behind the shop counter and pulled out a bottle of tequila and two shot glasses.

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Gerald walked up to the taxi cab, more out of curiosity then anything else. After all, how did Constantine manage to get his hands on a yellow taxi anyway? The window was open and singing (if it could be called that was blaring out the window.)

"The only one who could ever reach me was the son of a preacher man…"

Gerald pulled open the door and sat in the front passenger seat. The young man at the wheel turned round. It was his soft eyes and warm smile, as well as his off-key singing that told Gerald he could trust him.

"Hi I'm Chas, John Constantine's apprentice," Chas said with a notable air of pride in his voice.

Gerald smiled back and shook his hand warmly he took in the stack of occult reference books on the floor of the cab. The vehicle had a homely air, helped perhaps the smell from the freshly baked cookies Chas had started to nibble.

"Would you like one?"

Gerald shook his head then he said, "Sorry, bad manners, my name's Gerald. I suppose you heard all about the episode that happened in there?"

"Yeah, it really is fascinating. Tell me about it, how did you manage? I've been reading about all this for four years and I've worked with, Constantine for the same amount of time. I have heard cases of victims resisting slightly but not a fully fledged battle."

Gerald didn't reply immediately, he was thinking about how he had been dragged into all this against his will. It was one thing experimenting, it was another hearing and seeing the demon, knowing everything was real. He felt Chas touch his arm and he enjoyed the sensation perhaps a little too much.

"Gerald", Chas looked at him questioningly. He saw something flicker in his eyes, something that was familiar. He had been fighting the feelings himself for long before now, knowing such things were wrong. "You fight the same battle I do, don't you? I sometimes wonder if it's true what they say, the church is wrong about so many things."

Just then John opened the door to the back seat and they both fell silent.


End file.
